Once you hear the type of life orientation and mentality of some folks you’ll be dumbfounded. You start to ask your self what sort of blood is flowing in such individual’s physique. Little question, we live in a patriarchal society…some instances once I bear in mind my expertise from whence the title of this put up got here from I’m left dumbfounded and shrugging my shoulder in WONDER.
It was in the course of the Christmas season in 2020; I went to a gathering—that assembly is a contribution assembly the place they share foodstuffs on the finish of the 12 months. However I’m not a member of the assembly. I went there to signify my brother as he was not round. There within the assembly, there’s this pandemonium which will be both a very good one or dangerous one. In such gatherings altercations aren’t overlooked. I really minded my very own enterprise and acted as a spectator; they shared palm wine (often called Ozuu) in my native language. I really like palm wine as a result of it’s pure and nourishing!
As we have been having fun with the palm wine; a girl walked into the compound to fetch water—after which got here a murmuring and uproar…one man sitting reverse me gave the woman a nasty look and hissed with anger. “Girls of these days are nothing to write down residence about…how can a lady be sporting that type of costume….”? The younger woman was sporting a decent trouser exhibiting the form of her physique and pores and skin. I’m certain she didn’t know they have been speaking about her. A number of the males within the assembly have been laughing whereas others have been joined within the scolding.
The person who started speaking in regards to the woman took it very private as a result of he was very indignant. “Don’t be stunned that this woman is married and she or he is dressing like this…” he stated with resentment. “That’s the reason I’ve stated that my spouse should die earlier than me. She should die earlier than me.” He affirmed emphatically and passionately. One man amongst them requested him his motive for saying such assertion and he answered: “If I die earlier than my spouse she can have the privilege to start out dressing the way in which she likes; one other man will take her and begin having relationship along with her. Even in my grave I cannot be completely happy along with her and I’ll search revenge. So she should die earlier than me that’s the solely approach there can be peace…”
“So you don’t want your spouse to have a companion in case you are useless. Moreover, don’t you suppose two of you’ll develop previous collectively and by that point it’s essential to have completed coaching your youngsters and will probably be simply the 2 of you? Or is it not your want for the 2 of you to develop previous collectively”? One other man informed him. “Males usually die earlier than their wives due to the struggles and struggling males go via with the intention to present for his or her spouse and youngsters. So if I die earlier than my spouse one other man will come and take and begin having fun with what I’ve labored for. That can’t occur! She should die earlier than me! From his countenance one may inform simply that he’s a vindictive and malicious individual—the territorial and jealous companions!
I couldn’t consider my ears and eyes once I heard him say these. In my thoughts, I used to be like: now the poor spouse is at residence harmless; perhaps she is hurrying to arrange meal for her beloved husband and the so-called beloved husband is outdoors planning evil forward of her! Too dangerous! In my very own opinion and full transparency; I don’t suppose this man is an effective man. He doesn’t love the spouse—in any other case why would he have such plans.
Alternatively do you suppose a spouse would say such or want such for her husband?